Monday, December 22, 2008

elbaT ehT nuR esaelP ,tiorteD

I'm a fan of the San Francisco 49ers. Right now, the franchise is struggling to produce a winning product; and the team has a (interim) coach with questionable motivation tactics that will be fired before the end of 2009. However, one of the few things in which I can take solace is that as bad as the 'Niners currently are, we have nothing on the steaming pile of epic fail that is the Detroit Lions. The Lions lost again this past Sunday, making them 0-15 on the season. I'm sure that there is a good amount of football fans that want to see them complete infamous history and run the table in reverse; but I have a small request for the final game against the Packers. More after the random pic...

See, Detroit losing 42-7 again like they did yesterday is fine because it's a microcosm of just how inferior the team is to the rest of the NFL. However, I don't want another blowout. In fact, I want Detroit to be winning going into the fourth quarter crunch time. I want the players' and coaches' spirits to be high. I want owner William Clay Ford to believe, "Yes, we can! Our players still care!" When they score a touchdown, I want them to look like this:


Look at that joy. It's almost as if they believe they're still respected as a professional team. Anyway, back to my outcome for the game. In the fourth quarter, I want the Lions to be ahead of the Packers by, say, four points. Then, I want Aaron Rodgers to channel Joe Montana, Tom Brady, and Peyton Manning and lead Green Bay down the field on a last-minute touchdown drive for the win. To make it better, I want the touchdown pass to come with no time left.

What I'm trying to say is: I just don't want the Lions to lose tomorrow...I want it to hurt. I want Rod Marinelli's soul to be crushed, just to see if he'll something else smart to say in the postgame press conference. The reason why I don't want a blowout is because that's too easy of an escape for them. Any team can lay down for a game and just go through the motions, which is what Detroit has appeared to be doing this entire season. A close game means that the players have actully risen up and attempted to keep their names from history. A loss like that would be fitting punishment for a collection of players and coaches that chose to wallow in ineptitude. I refuse to believe that paid athletes can't come together to play above themselves, while at the same time catching the opposition on a bad day, to create a mixture for victory. I mean, the Chiefs have two wins; and this guy is their coach. There's absolutey no excuse for not winning a single game all year.

So yes, I want Detroit to lose a close one this coming Sunday. And please believe I will be laughing maniacally at them. Don't spoil my hopes, Detroit.



Peace.

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